Be wise. Be brave. Be tricky. (slithytove) wrote,
Be wise. Be brave. Be tricky.

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The Southeastern Pennsylvania Anti-Deer Society

I divide all plants into the following categories.

1. Those That Deer Won't Eat:
Barberry, perovskia, ferns, daffodils, pieris japonica, rocks, dirt, wrought iron garden furniture, automobiles, dogs, yellow jackets

2. Those That Books Say Deer Don't Eat But They Actually Do Because Deer Are Illiterate
Rhododendron, azalea, pachysandra, yucca, liriope, monarda, bleeding heart, opium poppies

3. Those That Are Out-and-out Poisonous, But That Deer Still Eat, Damn Them:

4. Those That Deer Would Walk Over Their Grandmothers to Eat, to Say Nothing of Your Garden:
Daylilies, tulips, hosta, yew, phalenopsis orchids, ailanthus

5. Those That Don't Fit the Above Categories But That Deer Also Eat:
All other known species of plant life

6. Those That Belong to the Emperor
7. Those Drawn With a Very Fine Camel's Hair Brush
8. Those That Have Just Broken A Flower Vase
9. Fabulous ones

Next year I will be planting digitalis. And if I don't find deer stretched out on the lawn in third degree heart block with junctional escape rhythms, I'll want to know why.
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